Birth Story

Let me tell the story of how little Kohen entered this world.

I suppose maybe I should start with the day before my scheduled induction which was set for Friday, August 3rd.  So on Thursday the 2nd, the girls went to my parent's house since we were to be at the hospital early the next morning at 6:30 am.  I battled pregnancy insomnia during this pregnancy and it reared it's ugly head that night as well.  This was of no surprise, I anticipated this was going to happen. As you can imagine, I could not shut my mind off.  My head was playing through 1,001 scenarios on how everything would unfold the following day. I was tossing and turning out on the couch while Nate was asleep and snoring in bed.  I tried to watch the Olympics to focus my mind on something else.  But you know, the realization that tomorrow at this time,  I will have held my baby boy and all of this will be behind me, there is nothing more exciting and anxiety provoking than that.  So I ended up dozing off for about 2 hours from about 12 am-2 am.  I had my alarm set for 4:30 but I decided to get up and start getting around at 4:00.

On the way, I decided I wanted to eat McDonald's breakfast.  So Nate swung through the drive thru.  He got himself a big cup of coffee to fuel himself up because he too had trouble sleeping the night before.  My hash brown was yummy but after a couple of bites of my sandwich I had to call it quits.  I think my nerves were getting the best of me.

We pulled up to the hospital and took advantage of the valet parking out front.  We went and checked in and a security guard came to escort us to our room: 2211.  Walking into the labor and delivery room is exciting.  Seeing the little warmer they place the baby on after he comes out and just being in the place, the actual room, where it's all going to happen is so great and relieving to finally be in that moment.

So then came the paperwork with the registration lady.  Then a nurse came in and started and IV in my hand.  I met my nurse who checked me and reported that I was dilated to 3 cm.  So no more progress since my last prenatal visit.  I had Nate make notes to track my progress and all the happenings so that I would be able to write a detailed birth story.

At 7:50 am the Pitocin, or "Go Juice" as one nurse called it, got started.  By 8:10 I felt my first "kind of big" contraction.  But then I didn't feel another one for quite some time after that.  At 9:45 my nurse broke my water and reported that I was now dilated to 4cm.  Both my mom and my mother-in-law came to the hospital.  They came and chatted for awhile and then left for awhile.  I received my epidural at 11:25.  Oh my gosh, I loath getting an epidural.  It was the one thing I was seriously dreading about giving birth again. I was dreading it so much I didn't even allow myself think too much about it because I didn't want to get myself all worked up about it.  The relief it provides makes it 100% worth it but I really hate having it done.  It just the creepiest feeling to have someone messing around near your spinal column.  The sting of the numbing stuff and then the pressure, uggg, it's making me wiggle around in my chair while I type this.  So the last time I had an epidural, I could not move my legs at all.  In fact, it was hours after having the baby that I regained enough sensation to get up and use the bathroom.  But this time, it was not as strong.  My legs felt numb but I could still move them.

At 12:10 I was dilated to 5 cm and then progressed to 7 cm at 1:10 pm.  I felt things were going pretty good at this point.  But comparing my labor with Clara, who I was also induced with, this one was going slower.    But then just 40 minutes later, at 1:50 I was at a 10.  Yea!  The magical number!

When the nurse checked me and reported I was at a 10 she got sort of a puzzled look on her face and said that she was feeling something unusual.  Instead of feeling his head, she said she was feeling something else.  Possibly an ear.  She called my Dr to let him know that I was at a 10 and to let him know what she had felt.  Dr. S would be there soon. So she decided to grab another nurse for another opinion.  Nurse #2 agreed she didn't feel his head and suggested maybe he was breech.  I started to get a little nervous.  My Dr. had been so convinced that he was head down and I could not believe that either he was wrong or that baby had somehow turned.  So the nursed grabbed the ultrasound machine to check his position.  They started looking and then in walked my Dr.  He reassured us that ultrasound showed that baby was head down.  So he checked me and then explained what he felt.  My baby had his head extended instead of flexed with his chin tucked to his chest.  A face presentation or brow presentation it's called since he was leading the way that that part of his head.  At first it didn't seem like too big of a deal.  The Dr. thought he might be able to help him tuck his chin and that he was still deliverable like that.  He spent some time examining and trying to move the baby's head. It was very uncomfortable.  My contractions were very strong at this time too.  Strong enough I started crying each time I had them.  I'm not sure if I was feeling so much pain because the epidural wasn't very strong or if it was the baby's presentation.  But either way, I was definitely uncomfortable. They gave me a bolus 2 times for some extra relief.   So Dr S left for a little while because he said I had a "little lip" left before being dilated to a complete 10.

He came back like an hour later to check again.  No good news.  Baby was still in the in same position.  He had me start pushing with my contractions while he was working with getting the baby to tuck his chin. He was able to get him to get into about the neutral position but then his head went back to the same extended position in between contractions.  I'm not sure how long this went on but I could sense that things were not looking good.  Dr. had his eyes glued to the monitor watching the baby's heart rate which was slowing and showing some stress.   Baby was not moving down the birth canal at all with my pushing.  So finally Dr. S reported that he was going to have to come out by c-section.  He believed that it would be best for the baby.  Those words really stung.  I didn't want a c-section in the worst kind of way.  I cried.  Through the Dr's and nurses apologies and explanations all I could do was nod my head and say "I understand." I couldn't even look at anyone but Nate in the eyes.

So after the official call was made, things started happening in a whirlwind.  More people in room,  papers to sign, explanations of what was about to happen.  The anesthesiologist came back in to give me more stuff through the epidural.  Nate was given surgery wear to put on.  Then before I knew it, I was wheeled into the cold OR and being prepped for surgery.  I was so tired all day long from the lack of sleep the night before but when I went into surgery it intensified 100%.  I have no idea if it were my nerves or if I was given something that was partly knocking me out but my eyes and my body just wanted to go to sleep.  I was trying to keep my composure and it seemed to help to lay there with my eyes closed and not watch the hustle and bustle of everyone prepping.  I remember a nurse asking me if I was going to my happy place and I responded softly, "Ya" without even opening my eyes and looking at her.  Then I heard Dr. S's voice say, "I just pinched your stomach pretty hard 4 times, could you feel that?"  I responded, "No."

I guess that gives the green light to start the surgery.  What literally felt like one minute later, I heard someone say, "Aw, there's his little face looking up at us."  Followed by Dr. S saying, "Okay you are going to feeling some tugging."
And then, just like that, Kohen was out.
He was quickly handed over to the NICU team waiting for him to check him out.  They didn't even hold him up over the curtain so that I could see him.  I know this is because he wasn't doing real good.  He wasn't crying which concerned me a little.  But I did hear him make a couple of little noises.  I found out later that his 1 minute Apgar score was only a 2.  Nate kept pacing between me and him.  He eventually took a picture of him and then showed me the picture on the camera so that I could see him.

While I was getting stitched up and I started getting so shaky.  My jaw and my arms were involuntarily trembling. Then I was rolled into recovery.  I was given something for the nausea I was experiencing but the shakes were making me very nervous feeling.  I just could not control the movements.  The anesthesiologist and nurses reassured me that it was normal but it was an awful feeling.  Finally Kohen was given to Nate and he brought him over to me so a could get a quick peak.  Then he was taken to the NICU nursery for observation for an hour.  I remember telling Nate, "I don't want any visitors.  I don't feel like seeing anyone." Kind of a bold statement, I know.  Especially since my mom and mother-in-law had been at the hospital waiting all day.  I'm not sure why I felt such an overwhelming feeling of not wanting to see anyone.  Most likely because it had been a long day, I was exhausted, shaking uncontrollably and  had yet to hold my baby boy.  I just wanted and needed time him.  And I wanted him all to myself to cuddle and nurse and to get to know.  And I wanted to sleep.

I never really thought I would end up with a c section.  At least I didn't think I would with #3.  I thought about it plenty with my first pregnancy, knowing it was a possibility.  But after you have 2 kids naturally and then you find out the baby you are carrying is not breech but rather head down just as he needs to be for delivery.  Well, I just didn't see it coming.  The hardest part for me was not to have "that moment."  That moment when you push the baby out and it's handed to you.  It's a moment of elation.  A moment that cannot be described.  Well I feel a bit robbed that I didn't have that feeling.  Instead, I looked at him on a camera screen.  Then I caught a small glimpse while Nate held him near me to see.  Obviously I did finally get to hold him.  That's the important thing. I am so thankful that everything turned out okay.  I'm so relieved that my Dr. made the decision he did and kept us both safe and sound.  He is absolutely handsome.  I could not love him more.

Thanks for reading along on my pregnancy blog.  From here, I will pick up back on my family blog.

39 Weeks

Well here I sit on August eve.  The long awaited month is about to arrive - I made it.  Or I guess I should say we made it.
I had my Dr.'s appointment yesterday afternoon.  Up until yesterday, I had always scheduled morning appointments but yesterday I had to have an afternoon one because it's all he had available. I think I had the first appointment after his lunch break because he smelled so strongly of onions when he entered the room.  I measured right on at 39 weeks and baby boy's heart beat was 131.  No dilation progress, his words, "I have you at a strong 3."  So still hanging onto that (for 2 weeks now!).  We discussed inducing as I decided that I would be okay with it.  So we set the date for this Friday, the 3rd, if he doesn't make his debut on his own before then.  I will be just 2 days shy of my due date of the 5th.  AAAAHHHH!  It's crazy.  Just crazy.  We have to be at the hospital at 6:30 a.m. to get things started.  Before Dr. S left the room, he shook my hand and said, "I'll see you on Friday!"  I cannot explain how that feels to hear him say that.  Of course, I'm approaching my due date and it is inevitable that the time is coming.  But to sit here right now, on Tuesday night and think that by next Tuesday, this pregnancy will be behind me.  Labor and delivery will be behind me.  I will have met our son.  I can't even wrap my mind around it.
So I've been kind of nervous about.  And rightfully so  I guess.  It's only like the biggest thing to go through.
So how I am feeling physically?  I'm getting a ton of pressure.  The feeling like if I move wrong he's just going to come right out.  I'm also experiencing some awful ligament pain which, at it's worst, can be paralyzing when I try to roll over in bed at night.  I thought I was stuck in bed last night when I woke up to go to the bathroom.  It was hurting so bad, I could barely move.  He's still very active and I cannot believe how big his movements are when you watch my belly moving all around. 
I continue to have pregnancy insomnia occasionally.  I can't seem to turn my mind off at night.  There is just so much to think about right now.  It weighs on my mind and it's hard to shut off.  A few nights ago I woke up to some contractions.  They were strong enough that I decided to start timing them but they amounted to nothing.  I was almost a little relieved.  It was 3:30 in the morning and I was tired.  I didn't feel like scrambling around to get the last minute things packed and waking the girls up at that hour.
But maybe I'll have to do that tonight.  You just never know :)

*Birth story to come!

38 Weeks

Below are some pictures of the nursery that is just waiting on our baby boy!  I am so thrilled with the way it turned out.  It's hard to believe it used to be painted purple and all very girly. 



But now onto the important stuff: an update on baby progress.  I had my appointment today and found out....there is no baby progress.  I'm still dilated to 3 cm but other than that, I got nothing!  It's kind of a bummer on the one hand, but on the other hand I wasn't really expecting to hear that I had progressed because I feel pretty much exactly the same as I did last week at this time.  But that is also the fun part AND the part that can drive a person CRAZY.  I could go through one more week of nothing happening OR I could start having contractions that send me into labor the second after I hit "publish" on this post.   You just never know.

So baby's heartbeat was 148 and Dr. S is very certain he is head down.  And so am I.  I can tell by the way the movements feel.  The movements I feel up high in my ribs feel like kicks where as the movements that I feel down low like against my hip bones are more squirmy like a head moving side to side.

My Dr. discussed induction. He was willing to induce me as early as this Friday if I wanted.  But I'm not ready for that.  There is no medical need for it and I feel like baby just needs some more time to make sure he gets all of his finishing touches complete.  However, it was really hard to not agree to have it done.  What my ears heard were, "So would you like to meet your baby on Friday?"  How on earth do you say, "Nah, I'll wait" to that?  I don't know, but somehow I did.  So the plan is to go back to the Dr. next Monday and maybe I'll give in to being induced then.  This is my last week of work and I hate to burn to much of my FMLA time without baby here.  So I know that next week I will really be feeling like I want to get the show on the road.

37 Weeks

I had my Dr.'s appointment this morning and learned that  I've made some progress...I'm dilated to 3cm!! WoooHooooo!  I was quite shocked to learn that I'm that far dilated considering I was a 1 last week.  So this kind of put s a whole new spin on my feelings of when we are going to meet this baby boy.  I've never been early and figured I wouldn't be this time either.  But now there is small part of me that is thinking maybe, just maybe, this guy will make his appearance early.  I only got up to 2 cm dilated before being induced 3 days prior to my due date with Clara.  With Alayna, I think I did reach a 3 but had her shortly thereafter.  So we'll see.  I realize I could walk around at  a 3 for some time still though.
Otherwise, I am still measuring big but Dr. S said that he does not think I am having a big baby.  He thinks I'm measuring high (or big) because the baby hasn't dropped yet.  He also thinks I'm carrying "all out front" which could be why I'm measuring big.  Baby's heartbeat was 145 and I'm 50% effaced.
I've been having a lot of Braxton Hicks contractions.  Mostly in the evening while I'm sitting with my feet up in my recliner.  It's funny how I never felt these with the girls and I'm feeling them all the time with this little guy.
So yesterday I stepped on a bee and was stung once (or maybe even twice) on my 2nd toe.  It hurt SO bad. It felt like I stepped on a knife.  So my toe is swollen and red.  It feels like I am walking around with a marble on the bottom of my toe.  That does nothing for my already disgustingly fat feet.
The girls have been loving feeling the baby make such big movements in my belly.  They love crawling up in my recliner - both at the same time - and just putting their hands on me. Sometimes it like my whole belly is dancing and other times, I feel a definite "knob" of some kind far over on my right side.  Clara also loves kissing my belly.  It's adorable.
Lastly, I wanted to share something Alayna said last week. 
She said, "Mommy, how do people know there is a baby in your belly?"
I said, "Well I guess because my belly is SO big."
She replied, "How do they know it's a baby and not just a lot of food?"
Haha, I couldn't help but think that was her way of asking me how people know that I'm not just fat.

36 Weeks

Well let the true countdown begin!  Only 4 more weeks to go, isn't that unbelievable?  I had my first of my weekly appointments today.  That's when you know it is getting very close. 
I am still measuring big, I think what Dr. S said is, "You are measuring 37....eh....almost 38 weeks." So it is what it is.  Could I be having a big baby?  I just don't know.  I'm hoping for another peanut.  I'm dilated to 1 cm.  Nothing to get too excited about but at least it is something.  I go back next Tuesday so hopefully I will show some more progress then.  So after my appointment, we took the girls to Babies R Us for a few things including a new swing, 2 crib sheets, and a boppy cover.  Then we went to Fazoli's for lunch.  It has literally been years since I've been there and I was a little disappointed.  What happened to their blackened chicken alfredo?  They don't have it anymore.  But their bread sticks are still delish.  We then took the girls to Build-a-Bear to have them make baby boy a gift to take to the hospital when is born.

With crazy-perfect coincidence, Clara chose a Happy Birthday shirt for her puppy.  Both girls did good and they had fun making them.  Alayna did struggle a little bit at the beginning because she didn't get to make one for herself too.  But she loosened up after we reassured her that she could play with the one she made until brother arrives.  And then came this evening....the girls put lip gloss on them.  So now there is a greenish sour apple hue around their lips.  And if it's any sign of what is  to come, Alayna's blue boy bear had added a skirt and earrings once he was home and she could dress him up.

In other pregnancy news, last week KICKED MY BUTT.  100+ degree days = big fat feet.  At least we have had some cooler temps this week.  But seriously, my feet spill out over flip flops that are a whole size larger than my normal size.

I'm starting to get some pressure.  When I stand up I get enough pressure that I either have to move slowly or just stand there a second until that feeling subsides.

The nursery is nearly complete.  I will post some pics soon, it is so adorable - I'm just in love with it.  I've also packed my "in case my water breaks at work" bag to keep in my car.  Not that I think it will, my water has never spontaneously broke.  It's always had to be done for me during labor.  But you never know!

Until next week :)





34 Weeks

Well here I am at 34 weeks.  If you think this heat is at all bothersome, try being pregnant in it - barf !
These 90+ degrees days are not pleasant.  Now in a couple of days we are supposed to reach 100.  Thank goodness for central air!

I had a doctors appointment today.  I'm still measuring 2 weeks big, so  I'm not totally sure what to make of that.  Dr. S never really acts like it's a big deal or an indication of anything.  I, however, keep wondering if it means this baby is going to be big.  I hope not for the sake of my body.  What if he is a 10 pounder??  Baby boy's heart rate was 143. I got my blood drawn again to check my anti M.  I feel like I've had my blood drawn at every single visit.  The lady who does it is really good at her job and easily finds my vein each time.  She's also a high school classmate of mine, so it's always nice to chit chat with her.

In other news, I did baby boy's first load of laundry last week.  It was kind of fun and oh so cute to be folding some miniature boy clothes.  But ya,  I know the joy of added laundry will not last long.  I bought some wonderful smelling Dreft to wash them in and make them all baby-smelling.  I soooo love that smell.  I remembered loving the smell of that stuff but when I unscrewed the cap and took a big whiff, I think I forgot just how good it smelled.   Mmmmm, it's so baby.  So he now has a couple of drawers full of boy-ee things all ready for him.

After my appointment today, I went to Carter's to look for a few things.  And for the first time ever, I walked through the door and turned to the right.  Towards the boy section.  I cannot count the number of times I have been there shopping. And each time, I go in,  I go to the left.   I can honestly say that I had never before stepped foot on "that side" of the store.  I'm still finding it a lot of fun to be buying boy things.  BUT  of course I had to venture over to the girls side before leaving and I realized how thankful I am to get to shop on that side as well.  There are just sooo many cute clothes for little girls.

My next appointment is in 2 weeks and then I believe I will be going weekly!  It's hard to believe the time is approaching.  A family of 5 - seriously?  Wow :)

32 Weeks

Seriously feet, give me a break already.

On the one hand I can't believe I only have 8 more weeks until we meet our baby.  On the other hand, I'm all, "Seriously, I still have 8 more weeks!?"  This is definitely taking a toll on my body, I feel so tired and worn out almost non-stop.

Though I know this is our last child, I can tell you that I would never agree to being this pregnant in the summer if we were ever to have another one. I just cannot tolerate the heat.  Summer dresses are my preferred dress of clothing right now.  I only want to be in the sun and heat for small spurts and then promptly return to the air conditioning.  Both of my girls were due in the middle of winter and I think compared to this, that's the better time to do it.  However, the one advantage will be that he'll have a summer birthday so that will be good for birthday parties.  Not to mention that all of the birthdays in the family (both sides) are in fall/winter.  So this will be nice.

He's moving around a ton which I love love love.    He feels so big in there. 

Below I posted some pictures from the ultrasound I had done last Tuesday.

My baby boy!

Foot by his face



Here I am - 32 weeks