Birth Story

Let me tell the story of how little Kohen entered this world.

I suppose maybe I should start with the day before my scheduled induction which was set for Friday, August 3rd.  So on Thursday the 2nd, the girls went to my parent's house since we were to be at the hospital early the next morning at 6:30 am.  I battled pregnancy insomnia during this pregnancy and it reared it's ugly head that night as well.  This was of no surprise, I anticipated this was going to happen. As you can imagine, I could not shut my mind off.  My head was playing through 1,001 scenarios on how everything would unfold the following day. I was tossing and turning out on the couch while Nate was asleep and snoring in bed.  I tried to watch the Olympics to focus my mind on something else.  But you know, the realization that tomorrow at this time,  I will have held my baby boy and all of this will be behind me, there is nothing more exciting and anxiety provoking than that.  So I ended up dozing off for about 2 hours from about 12 am-2 am.  I had my alarm set for 4:30 but I decided to get up and start getting around at 4:00.

On the way, I decided I wanted to eat McDonald's breakfast.  So Nate swung through the drive thru.  He got himself a big cup of coffee to fuel himself up because he too had trouble sleeping the night before.  My hash brown was yummy but after a couple of bites of my sandwich I had to call it quits.  I think my nerves were getting the best of me.

We pulled up to the hospital and took advantage of the valet parking out front.  We went and checked in and a security guard came to escort us to our room: 2211.  Walking into the labor and delivery room is exciting.  Seeing the little warmer they place the baby on after he comes out and just being in the place, the actual room, where it's all going to happen is so great and relieving to finally be in that moment.

So then came the paperwork with the registration lady.  Then a nurse came in and started and IV in my hand.  I met my nurse who checked me and reported that I was dilated to 3 cm.  So no more progress since my last prenatal visit.  I had Nate make notes to track my progress and all the happenings so that I would be able to write a detailed birth story.

At 7:50 am the Pitocin, or "Go Juice" as one nurse called it, got started.  By 8:10 I felt my first "kind of big" contraction.  But then I didn't feel another one for quite some time after that.  At 9:45 my nurse broke my water and reported that I was now dilated to 4cm.  Both my mom and my mother-in-law came to the hospital.  They came and chatted for awhile and then left for awhile.  I received my epidural at 11:25.  Oh my gosh, I loath getting an epidural.  It was the one thing I was seriously dreading about giving birth again. I was dreading it so much I didn't even allow myself think too much about it because I didn't want to get myself all worked up about it.  The relief it provides makes it 100% worth it but I really hate having it done.  It just the creepiest feeling to have someone messing around near your spinal column.  The sting of the numbing stuff and then the pressure, uggg, it's making me wiggle around in my chair while I type this.  So the last time I had an epidural, I could not move my legs at all.  In fact, it was hours after having the baby that I regained enough sensation to get up and use the bathroom.  But this time, it was not as strong.  My legs felt numb but I could still move them.

At 12:10 I was dilated to 5 cm and then progressed to 7 cm at 1:10 pm.  I felt things were going pretty good at this point.  But comparing my labor with Clara, who I was also induced with, this one was going slower.    But then just 40 minutes later, at 1:50 I was at a 10.  Yea!  The magical number!

When the nurse checked me and reported I was at a 10 she got sort of a puzzled look on her face and said that she was feeling something unusual.  Instead of feeling his head, she said she was feeling something else.  Possibly an ear.  She called my Dr to let him know that I was at a 10 and to let him know what she had felt.  Dr. S would be there soon. So she decided to grab another nurse for another opinion.  Nurse #2 agreed she didn't feel his head and suggested maybe he was breech.  I started to get a little nervous.  My Dr. had been so convinced that he was head down and I could not believe that either he was wrong or that baby had somehow turned.  So the nursed grabbed the ultrasound machine to check his position.  They started looking and then in walked my Dr.  He reassured us that ultrasound showed that baby was head down.  So he checked me and then explained what he felt.  My baby had his head extended instead of flexed with his chin tucked to his chest.  A face presentation or brow presentation it's called since he was leading the way that that part of his head.  At first it didn't seem like too big of a deal.  The Dr. thought he might be able to help him tuck his chin and that he was still deliverable like that.  He spent some time examining and trying to move the baby's head. It was very uncomfortable.  My contractions were very strong at this time too.  Strong enough I started crying each time I had them.  I'm not sure if I was feeling so much pain because the epidural wasn't very strong or if it was the baby's presentation.  But either way, I was definitely uncomfortable. They gave me a bolus 2 times for some extra relief.   So Dr S left for a little while because he said I had a "little lip" left before being dilated to a complete 10.

He came back like an hour later to check again.  No good news.  Baby was still in the in same position.  He had me start pushing with my contractions while he was working with getting the baby to tuck his chin. He was able to get him to get into about the neutral position but then his head went back to the same extended position in between contractions.  I'm not sure how long this went on but I could sense that things were not looking good.  Dr. had his eyes glued to the monitor watching the baby's heart rate which was slowing and showing some stress.   Baby was not moving down the birth canal at all with my pushing.  So finally Dr. S reported that he was going to have to come out by c-section.  He believed that it would be best for the baby.  Those words really stung.  I didn't want a c-section in the worst kind of way.  I cried.  Through the Dr's and nurses apologies and explanations all I could do was nod my head and say "I understand." I couldn't even look at anyone but Nate in the eyes.

So after the official call was made, things started happening in a whirlwind.  More people in room,  papers to sign, explanations of what was about to happen.  The anesthesiologist came back in to give me more stuff through the epidural.  Nate was given surgery wear to put on.  Then before I knew it, I was wheeled into the cold OR and being prepped for surgery.  I was so tired all day long from the lack of sleep the night before but when I went into surgery it intensified 100%.  I have no idea if it were my nerves or if I was given something that was partly knocking me out but my eyes and my body just wanted to go to sleep.  I was trying to keep my composure and it seemed to help to lay there with my eyes closed and not watch the hustle and bustle of everyone prepping.  I remember a nurse asking me if I was going to my happy place and I responded softly, "Ya" without even opening my eyes and looking at her.  Then I heard Dr. S's voice say, "I just pinched your stomach pretty hard 4 times, could you feel that?"  I responded, "No."

I guess that gives the green light to start the surgery.  What literally felt like one minute later, I heard someone say, "Aw, there's his little face looking up at us."  Followed by Dr. S saying, "Okay you are going to feeling some tugging."
And then, just like that, Kohen was out.
He was quickly handed over to the NICU team waiting for him to check him out.  They didn't even hold him up over the curtain so that I could see him.  I know this is because he wasn't doing real good.  He wasn't crying which concerned me a little.  But I did hear him make a couple of little noises.  I found out later that his 1 minute Apgar score was only a 2.  Nate kept pacing between me and him.  He eventually took a picture of him and then showed me the picture on the camera so that I could see him.

While I was getting stitched up and I started getting so shaky.  My jaw and my arms were involuntarily trembling. Then I was rolled into recovery.  I was given something for the nausea I was experiencing but the shakes were making me very nervous feeling.  I just could not control the movements.  The anesthesiologist and nurses reassured me that it was normal but it was an awful feeling.  Finally Kohen was given to Nate and he brought him over to me so a could get a quick peak.  Then he was taken to the NICU nursery for observation for an hour.  I remember telling Nate, "I don't want any visitors.  I don't feel like seeing anyone." Kind of a bold statement, I know.  Especially since my mom and mother-in-law had been at the hospital waiting all day.  I'm not sure why I felt such an overwhelming feeling of not wanting to see anyone.  Most likely because it had been a long day, I was exhausted, shaking uncontrollably and  had yet to hold my baby boy.  I just wanted and needed time him.  And I wanted him all to myself to cuddle and nurse and to get to know.  And I wanted to sleep.

I never really thought I would end up with a c section.  At least I didn't think I would with #3.  I thought about it plenty with my first pregnancy, knowing it was a possibility.  But after you have 2 kids naturally and then you find out the baby you are carrying is not breech but rather head down just as he needs to be for delivery.  Well, I just didn't see it coming.  The hardest part for me was not to have "that moment."  That moment when you push the baby out and it's handed to you.  It's a moment of elation.  A moment that cannot be described.  Well I feel a bit robbed that I didn't have that feeling.  Instead, I looked at him on a camera screen.  Then I caught a small glimpse while Nate held him near me to see.  Obviously I did finally get to hold him.  That's the important thing. I am so thankful that everything turned out okay.  I'm so relieved that my Dr. made the decision he did and kept us both safe and sound.  He is absolutely handsome.  I could not love him more.

Thanks for reading along on my pregnancy blog.  From here, I will pick up back on my family blog.